A Contradiction of a LIFETIME!!!

Friday, October 22, 2010

Our lives are filled with contradictions.

Y "The early bird gets the worm"  "Good things come to those who wait."  Y
 Y "Look before you leap." Y "Two heads are better than one." Y 
Y "You can't tell a book by its cover." Y

Recently I was talking to a group of my friends about a contradiction that seems to be a reoccurring topic of discussion (and debate). Why is it, that a man who "enjoys the company of women" is considered a ladies man, a player, or a pimp? Mind you, all of these terms are used positively and as a compliment.  When on the flip-side, a woman who has the same desires and game is thought of as a slut, a whore, easy, or desperate? Obviously these are negative and HARSH!

It is in our genetic make up to do things we enjoy, and to not just try to survive. Humans are the only mammals (besides dolphins and the Bonobo monkey) that have sex for pleasure (and fun).  It seems so unfair that a strong and confident woman can be viewed in such a negative light.  Especially when the only thing that differs in the equation is what's found between each person's legs.

There is no difference in a man or a woman wanting to "have a little fun".  Aren't both craving the same rush? Why should it make any difference? Can't good game be considered good game (and if it was safe and fun) isn't that all that really matters?  A male gets respect for getting around but when it comes to a female, she is disrespected and seen as trash. Funny how that works right?

Oh, and it's not just the guys dishing the insults.  We've all heard the phrase, "Hell hath no fury like a woman scorned."  The basic translation: a woman rejected in love can be very angry and dangerous.

Lets also not forget about the competition and jealousy from others.  Rumors sometimes get started and with that comes a tsunami of unwanted bs and gossip. And mind you, this isn't just restricted to women.  I have known a hand full of men who have bigger mouths then most ladies. Some people will try and start their drama and get the word around about business that nobody should be talking about except for the parties involved. Before you know it words like slut, easy, and desperate are thrown around as carelessly as an opened condom wrapper. 

One of my guy friends thinks women can without a doubt be bigger "players" then guys.  He has said that while a woman can just be herself, look nice, and have a good attitude...a man has a much rougher road ahead of him. Even at a very young age on playgrounds young boys are playing sports and enjoying outdoors.  Girls are talking to each other about the world (and developing better communication skills) and playing with dolls (understanding social relationships). Men are trained to be the pursuers which is often more of a disadvantage.

So if the playing-field is technically even (or if women have a slight advantage) my question is this: Is it possible to drop the negative connotations and encourage the use of positive/congratulatory expressions instead?  How about instead of pimp and whore...we use words like OVER ACHIEVER and ENTHUSIAST?

I end this blog the way I started...with contradictions.  And actually, some "food" for thought.  It is said that you can't teach an old dog new tricks.  But at the same time, it's never too late to learn.  So my dear readers, what do you think?  Can a woman be a player?  Are the names we use too harsh? How about some new words to throw into our vocabulary?

I can't wait to start using some of these new terms (Over achiever?  HA!).  How about you???


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